Dec 29, 2009

Busy!

Well, as you can imagine moving from part time teaching back to full time has surely kept me busy. At school I prepare for the day and week ahead...at home I grade papers (well attempt to) and prepare for what is coming next in kindergarten. It sure has been a challenging year- full of its ups and downs! But it has been a good school year thus far. My students are learning and I especially love seeing the excitement on their faces when they learn something new and catch on to a concept. I am looking for what the Lord has for me next year. I am praying that I am able to stay where I am...BUT I am also trying to focus on "not my will Lord but Thine be done."
Hopefully I will be able to catch up on my blog the next couple of days....I've seem to have a bit-o writers block...=)

Oct 29, 2009

Handwriting Class

It never ceases to amaze me the things that my students say! Today during handwriting class I talked to my class about doing their best in their work--even if it means taking their time to make their paper look neat. I told them that when they do not do they're  best they are sinning. One of my students that I have really been working with in his behavior raised his hand (which was exciting) and after calling on him said "If you are doing your best and not writing neatly we are lying to you because you may think we can't do it." I was excited when he mentioned this and praised him for what he said. I told him, "Jamari you're right, I haven't thought about that."

Its been amazing to see my students grow and even though at the time I get tired of repeating myself all the time and getting unto my students I look and see in the end its worth it all! This is why I do what I do and why I love it!

Oct 26, 2009

Special Visit!

It has been since June since I've seen anyone from my hometown, Lexington, North Carolina. I do miss my church family there, and wish I could visit more. This week my pastor, his wife, and their little girl was in Jacksonville, so pastor can preach at a Bible college here. My mother mentioned to me that they were going to be in town and said that they might visit if they had a chance. I knew they would be busy so I knew not to get my hopes up to high, but at the same time really hoping to see them. During my student't rest time, Mrs. Reynolds paged my classroom and told me to come out to the hallway. I was excited when I saw Claire running around the corner and Pastor and Mrs Harris following behind. It made me realize how much I really miss my friends and family in NC. It was a great to show them my classroom, my students (even though some of them were being their naughty selves), and chat with them for a little while. What a blessing to see someone from home!

Oct 13, 2009

The Season of Singleness

Many times I have thought "How complete my life would be if I had a husband." or "My life will not be complete until I get married." How wrong was I in thinking that. Its funny I spend many wasteful thoughts and time thinking about my future husband and better my life would be married. I always felt my life would not be complete until I got married, or that my life wouldn't be fulfilled until I got married. How wrong was I....The Lord has really been teaching and showing me that I don't need a husband to make me complete. I don't need a husband to fulfill God's purpose in my life. Although I still have a desire to get married I am seeing that Christ is the only one that complete me. He is the only ONE that won't fail me, leave me, and is the only one that will fulfill my needs. My friend Lori has passed on an author to me that has written some wonderful books on "God's Intent for Every Woman." Leslie Ludy has hit the nail on the head and has been an encouragement to my heart.

Oct 10, 2009

New Blog Address

Well I hope this works...=) I changed my email address from hotmail to gmail and already had a gmail account from when I first taught...well anyway...this is where I will be writing now! =)

Oct 7, 2009

Busy Busy Busy

Funny thing....I almost forgot I had a blog =)
Things here in FL have been very busy! I am back to teaching full time again. I am at school at times until 4:30 or even 5:00 getting things ready for the next day. It has been a challenging but a good year. The Lord has been teaching me a lot. I have 16 students (started out with 17, then 18, then 16), 10 boys and 6 girls! They are all fun to work with but can be a handful at times. When I am not focusing on teaching (which happens a lot...even at home) I am keeping up with my house....which during school I've been awful at getting things done. When I am not home I am with friends~
I am hoping to take some time and catch up on blogging soon...=)

Jul 1, 2009

The Most Sobering Reality….

“The most sobering reality in the world today is that people are dying and going to Hell today.” Dr. Bob Jones III

Dr. Bob would say this quote many times during my days at BJU. He would say the first part and the students and teachers would say the second part. The first time we said it it impacted my life. But after awhile I honestly felt like a broken record. I forgot about this saying until Sunday when yet another ‘”famous person” died. This past week it seemed four celebrities passed on—Michael Jackson, Ferrah Faucet, Billy Mays, and Ed MacHanon. I only knew who two of these people were. I look back and wonder where these people are today. I don’t want to make any judgments since it is God who does the judging. But where are these people today? Are any of them in heaven? By the way these people seemed to live their lives for fame and fortune it doesn’t seem that way. Did anyone make an attempt to witness to these people? We will never know until we get to heaven what happened to these people. But I am reminded again that people are dying, people are not saved, and people go to a painful eternity.

Jun 24, 2009

2 Samuel 22: 31, 33

“As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord in tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him. God is my strength and power: and he maketh his way perfect.”

His way is perfect…Trust the Lord…God gives strength and power…His way is perfect.

The past month has been a time for me to really learn that His way is perfect and that He is in control of my future and my life. Even in life’s uncertainties He maketh His way perfect.

I need to trust God, since I do  not know the future. In February, it was announced that the school was going to go through a few changes—meaning cutting teachers. This was a point of uncertainty in my life. I prayed the the Lord would give me peace, would help me trust Him, and would show me what to do. Several months passed and  to be honest--- I was beginning to fret. I was becoming fearful that I would not have a job, wondering if I needed to go ahead and apply for a new job, wondering if I should move back home, wondering if I should post my name on AACS website, and wondering “is the Lord’s will for me to still be here?” Every day I would fret more it seemed the closer I would come to finding a new job. But God was my buckler sun and building and I needed to trust Him. I came to the point that I prayed, “Lord I am trusting YOU, please show me what you want me to do, whatever you have for me I know this is your perfect plan and know that your way is far better than mine.” Time came and my principal came to me. Now, my stomach began to do flip flops because I thought it could mean one of two things~ yes or no on my job. The Lord is good he knew what He wanted me to do and that was to remain here to continue teaching. His way is perfect and all I needed to do was trust in Him.

A Year Later (written but not published on May 14)

It is hard to believe that a year ago today, May 14th, I was in my first car accident. Traveling to a friends home, my tire blew, I lost control of my car and while going 60+ mph I hit a concrete barrier. I look back and see how the Lord worked in my life.

He provided the money for therapy, He gave me rides to therapy when I didn’t have a car. He provided a car (my old one). God has been good. Although, I still suffer from a bit of back pain at times the Lord helps me through the days I hurt.

I have to be honest and say….I do miss my little Chevy Cavalier, but there was a reason the LORD took it away from me the way He did.

Apr 14, 2009

It is Hard to Believe

It is hard to believe that school will be over in 45 days (including weekends). This school year has flown by. It seems like yesterday I was trying to figure out what to wear for Orientation night, how to do my hair, and having butterflies in my stomach. This school year has been wonderful! I will miss my 10 afternoon students and the 17 students I teacher aide in the morning. Its been amazing to see them grow physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.

God has been good to have placed me in such a wonderful ministry!

Apr 12, 2009

Potter & Clay

I have always been fascinated with a potter's wheel and a potter forming a vase, bowl, or cup out of a lump of clay. Every time I would watch a potter make something I would think of the passage in the Bible "He is the Potter I am the clay." The biggest lesson I have learned since moving away from my family is that I am a simple piece of clay in the Lord's hands. No matter what comes my way God allows it to make me and mold me to be more like Him. During those hard times and even the easy times I need to trust in Him (which is something I am still constantly learning to do).
I found a song years ago while at BJU that really touched my heart--which is so true to a Christian's life. The words to this song is a prayer of mine.


"Though He Slay Me"
By: Linda Moldrem


As God molds the clay for a vessel
It may be a task full of pain;
But knowing the heart of a Potter
A vessel of love He will frame.
Each thread of my life He weaves a pattern
The Lord has laid out in advance;
A fabric that's fashioned with beauty,
The Master leaves nothing to chance.
Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him;
Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him;
I lay my heart on His alter,
And rest in His infinite care
Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him.

Knowing, Growing, and Glowing

written October 2008, on my Facebook page

God has taught me so much over the past few weeks about who He is and about His grace in my life. The past few weeks has been a spiritual battle wondering why God is allowing my dad to go through cancer treatments. I as wondering why God would allow someone who has been dedicated to His service to have to go through the chemo treatments. I asked.
my best friend Amy why...and she had no answer. I asked myself why...I had no answer. I asked God why...and of course He was the only one with the answered that I needed. I started to really pray that the Lord would show me somehow why my family and why my dad needed this valley in our lives. There have been times I was ready to cry, ready to hop on on plane or in my car to run to my dad and to my family. But God has shown me that I needed to go through this from a distance. Perhaps to see that only He will give me that peace and the fact I need to lean on God a lot more while a piece of my heart is in North Carolina.
Sunday morning my pastor preached a message I felt was really for me and one that I needed to hear. He spoke about the church comforted and how the Thessalonians church was going through a hard time but it was to help them to know, grow, and glow.
I applied this in my life that I know God is in control of the situation and His hand is upon my dad and my family. I know that God had this planned long long ago.
I will grow more and more in Christ and closer to Him as I lean on God more.
In the end I will glow---I will have joy through the trial.
It's great to know that God is in control of each aspect of my dad's life, my family's life, but best of all my own life. I am looking forward to what the Lord is going to teach me over the next few weeks and months.
God is good, God is faithful, God is always in Control-
God is all that I need :)

Apr 11, 2009

Reflections on 2008

I know it is four months into the year, but while “cleaning” my facebook page-deleting notes and such I found this. I thought it should have a place on my blog :)

Time flies...boy 2008 sure did fly by fast. It seems like yesterday I was at my best friend Hannah's house pigging out on ice cream, watching movies, and taking a chance to watch that ball drop on the television--jumping up and down and celebrating the upcoming year. I never expected 2008, to be as hard as it was, but at the same time a growing time and a time I grew closer to Christ.
In April, I was informed that I was going to be moved from teaching 1st grade to a K-4 teacher's aide position--I was devastated thinking I was not doing well--I spent several hours crying on Andy's shoulder. But the Lord really brought me out of discouraging time and showed me this is where HE wanted me to be--in the kindergarten division at my school. I have LOVED LOVED LOVED teaching kindergarten in the afternoon. Teaching them how to read, write, and even tie their shoes has been exciting.
On May 14, around 8:00 P.M. my life took yet another very dramatic and traumatic turn. I was driving from Jacksonville, Florida, to Hannah's house in Blythwood, SC to go to Greenville two days later for a wedding. While driving along I-26 West in Columbia, SC, going 60 mph-- my tire blew, I lost control of my car,and ran it into a concrete barrier. All I remember was being scared since I was by myself. The Lord shielded His loving arms around me and protected me from danger. It turned out to be a very adventurous100_2097 and scary evening--Two firetrucks came to block traffic (yes I stopped traffic); an EMT truck, and a police officer (which my best friends mom said was cute). The police officer was kind by not "faulting" me, and while sitting to wait for Hannah's parents (which were 15-20 minutes away) he let me sit in his car...:0) The only injuries I had was a very sore back (which even after therapy still bothers me some), a bump on my nose, and a very badly bruised knee. I did total my car~ but again the Lord took care of me by allowing the Davis family to be there to help--and my friend Lori came all the way from Jacksonville to Blythewood to come get me...oh and Hannah's pastor took my back to Columbia after the wedding to meet up with Lori- I was without a car for a month~ the Lord was good again by providing patient an loving people to drive me to physical therapy. A month afer my accident I did get my parents old car and had transportation...I am also a much more cautious driver and pray alot more now while on the road~ it took two months until I even drove back on the interstate.
The Lord has also brought several people into my life to teach me to depend soley on the Lord and give HIM my heart. It was a hard lesson to learn but God is Good.
My dad was diagnosed with sarcoma this summer and began chemo treatments~ yet another time to really look to the Lord (read my notes about "Knowing, Growing,and Glowing"
There are so many things I would love to share but these are only a few. I am looking foward to 2009, and looking at it with eyes and a open heart saying, "Lord your will be done."

Mar 31, 2009

Answered Prayer

I had a very hard Thursday afternoon last week… thoughts of wondering how I can pay off my school debt and pay my phone bill…on top of groceries. I have seen the Lord take care of me many many times, but there are still times I question where the money will come from to pay my bills. Thursday evening I was trying to make out some type of budget and praying for the Lord’s provision. Since this week is spring break I was still going to get paid for the week  from my teacher salary. I started to pray for a way to make some extra cash to pay things off, to possibly buy a new outfit for Easter (which is okay if I don’t get one), and to meet the other needs I have. On Friday, the daycare supervisor at my church asked me if I were going anywhere for my break. I replied, “no not this year.” She asked if I would like to work in the daycare during my break if she needed me. I immediately said, “yes!” I knew this was the way the Lord was answering my prayer. God is so good to me and there are times I look at my life and feel I do not deserve all the goodness that God has given me. We have a great and loving Savoir who is always there to meet our needs…and for that I am thankful.

Feb 27, 2009

The Love of God

The love of God is greater far ~ Than tongue or pen can ever tell~ It goes beyond the highest star~ And reaches to the lowest hell; The guilty pair, bowed down with care, God gave his Son to win: His erring child He reconciled~ And pardoned from his sin.”
Could we with ink the ocean fill~ And where the skies of parchment made, Were every stalk on earth a quill~ And every man a scribe by trade, To write trade, To write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry, Nor could the scroll contain the whole~ Tho stretched from sky to sky.”
Oh love of God, How rich and pure! How measureless and strong! It shall forever more endure—The saints and angels’ song.
The beach has become one of my favorite places here in Jacksonville. Enjoying God’s creation reminds me of his greatness, faithfulness, power, mercy, grace, and love. It also is a reminder that way across that deep wide ocean there are missionaries and people who need Christ. The sand reminds me of the verse Psalm 139 that God knows and cares about me and my thoughts. He knows what is ahead of me and cares.
The ocean reminds me much of God’s love. If you read the words to the song above you will know why. This impacted my life my last year of college. I grew up knowing that God loved me. There were times that things would happen in my life and I would wonder “If God loved me why would He allow this to happen.”  But after singing this song in church it really touched my heart and life~ and brought tears to my eyes. Its wonderful to know that there is a God that loves me more than anyone in this world. His love for me would drain the ocean dry since it is so bountiful. It would be hard to write all about God’s love in the sky because God’s love in so wide and wonderful. It is wonderful to know that there is a God that loves me and not only me everyone!
2011: Valentine holiday made me want to start out with punching the teddy bears at wal-mart, gagging at all the mushy cards, and rolling my eyes at the flowers (at least I am honest). Then I had the attitude (and still do) that valentines day is just a commercialized holiday so the greeting card company can make more money...BUt then I began thinking about who my valentine  is...I mean I have my students who are adorable when handing out their Spiderman, barbie, and princess valentines and candy. I have my good friends....But then it hit me---I have the BEST VALENTINE of All!!!!! He has written me the best LOVE LETTER that beats anything I receive! Its a LOVE LETTER I want to read and He is a valentine I want to know more! Thant valentine is JESUS! So this valentines day I want to focus on the LOVE God has for ME and focus on LOVING HIM more.

Feb 21, 2009

Evidence Not Seen

Darlene Diebler Rose is an extraordinary missionary that despite any circumstance kept faith in God and never wavered. Darlene and her husband Russell gave their lives to the people in New Guinea. They said, “Here I am Lord” not knowing what would be ahead of them. After the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor the Japanese military began to invade different islands around them. The Japanese came and arrested the men (all except Dr. Jaffrey) and took them to prison. Soon after the missionary ladies were arrested. Darlene had no contact with Russell. Darlene kept her testimony during the years in the prisoner camp. She witnessed to all she came in contact with. She soon was taken to an interrogation room where the interrogators would beat them. She contracted dysentery, beriberi, and malaria—while having a limited diet of rice. She wore the same dress for a very long time. She faced the executioners sword and shared Christ with him!

Darlene Diebler Rose kept her faith in Christ and trusted Him. Darlene said that she would never go back to New Guinea, but the Lord gave her a love for the people and Darlene said “yes I will go”

Darlene went through so much while serving Christ. While reading Evidence Not Seen” the thought came to me…" Would I be willing to go through all Darlene did?” I thought many times I could not and would not want to. But then I think again and pray that I would be able to be willing and ready to be persecuted for my love for Christ.

I also look at the trials in my life are what God gives me to mold me and make me into what He wants me to be.

Read Evidence Not Seen it is a remarkable story and one that all should read!

Feb 16, 2009

My Dad

This past summer was a challenging and emotional summer for me. It seemed every time I turned around something was going on…my best friend left home, my finances were horrible, I could not find a job, I couldn’t go home. The hardest thing of the summer was when my father was diagnosed with sarcoma, cancer of the tissue. The day he had his surgery was the same day I moved from my house to my trailer. I was thankful to be busy, but it was still hard not being with my family. I have to admit, I asked God so many times “why” – why someone who has served the Lord for over 30 years could have cancer, why it had to be my dad, why I had to be here. It wasn’t until my pastor preached a message on trials. That the Lord gives them to us for a reason.

My dad went on chemotherapy. The first week was hard, I was worried, biting my nails, not being focused at work. I called home constantly making sure my dad was okay. The months past. I was wanting to see my family soon—so I didn’t have to drive. The Lord made the way for me to see them at Thanksgiving. My seeing my dad with no hair was hard.. but no mater what he is still the most handsome man ever.

 

This week my dad finishes his 5th round and Lord willing, his last round of treatments. After he completes this round of chemo he will have various tests and CT scans to make sure everything is negative (which I don’t get why they say negative when you want something to be good :) ). Thank you to those who have prayed for dad and my family.

God is good and faithful and He will never give me anything too big that I cannot handle on my own~

Feb 15, 2009

Christ Being the Picture of a Servant

One of my favorite Bible passages has become Philippians 2: 5-8, which says “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:Who being in the form of God thought it not robbery to be equal with God: But made  himself of no reputation and took upon himself the form of a servant and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.”

I think of Christ being a servant through the illustration of Christ washing the disciples feet. From what I have heard the roads were dusty, the people wore sandals, and the feet would become very dirty. Washing feet was probably  the “least liked”job. But, Christ washing the feet of His followers was not only a demonstration of love, but was also a demonstration of Christ being a servant.

Through the years I have learned that I should take upon the form of a servant in my life. There may be things that I may not enjoy doing, but when I do not do those things it will show pride. Pride is a sin. Pride is putting myself first before God or others. 100_4653I need to show humbleness and have a willing heart to do even the most undesirable job.

Christ is the perfect example of on who took upon the form of a servant. I need to be like Christ and do the same. 

 

Feb 14, 2009

God’s Provision…a Chair

Some of my household furniture was given to me through friends. Some of the chairs to my kitchen table are old and time by time I guess through use the seat of the chairs are cracked. Well, needless to say I am down to one chair and even that is splitting. I was going to go look at Target® or Wal-Mart® for some kitchen chairs knowing that they would be expensive. I asked a friend at church of they knew of any place I could get some nice chairs for a good price. She offered to let me buy some chairs, that she has been trying to sell from her. It was amazing to see how the Lord provided because only yesterday I prayed for a way to get some new kitchen chairs~

Feb 10, 2009

Prayer

I have learned so much over the past seven months about the impact of prayer. There are some things I cannot share on this blog that has been on my heart. One issue has been going on the months now. I’ve stayed awake nights praying for something. The past months I have wanted to give up but the Lord somehow reminded me not to give up. He brought people in from the Bible to my mind to be godly examples~ Hannah wanted a son and prayed for what seemed along time~ God blessed her when she gave it to the Lord.

Job lost his possessions, his family, his wife of all people told him to “curse God and die". It seemed he wanted to give up even after his health was taken away, but he kept his eyes on the Lord—even though at times he may have asked “why.” I’ve been much like this is a situation asking “why Lord why…” But the Lord reminds me to keep my eyes on Him.

The lesson in the New Testament when the disciples where in the boat and Jesus was sleeping. The disciples asked “Lord don’t you care if we perish or not.” But yet, God showed his great love. He calmed the winds and the waves~ He was in complete and ultimate control of the situation. I may never me in control of the situations in my own life~ but GOD always is and always has a plan. He calms those waves in my heart and helps me see that He is the only one to give me complete and total peace.

Jeremiah and the potter’s house has shown me God is making a vessel through everything he presses upon my life and heart. He wants to mold me into what HE wants me to be~ and as the song says, “its a task full of pain and care I’m molding a masterpiece of great beauty.”

Through the months I’ve learned all this about prayer~ Here are some things for you to pray about for me~

  • * Hannah-
  • * My dad completing cancer treatments
  • * summer employment
  • * Aunt Cathi LaCounte: melanoma has spread to lung and liver—NEEDS TO BE SAVED
  • *Aunt Phyllis: has quit cancer treatments for lung cancer

Prayer changes things~ Never give up!

 

A Thought…

I have questioned at times why God can love someone like me.  The times I do not trust God—I feel like I fail yet HE still loves me. I lose friends—yet He is always there. I go through hard times—but He has not given me anything too big I could not handle without His help. I am thankful for a God who loves and cares and who no matter what is always there when the world turns their back on me.

It is great to know that there is a God—ONE GOD~ who created me, who knows my thoughts, who knows my future, who is patient when at times I feel I fail, who is always there when at times I don’t always go to HIM for all things.

 

Just a bit of thoughts before bed time

Feb 7, 2009

Journey of a Lifetime

Throughout 2009 my church will be going through the Bible together—reading, memorizing, and learning about each book. This should be an exciting time. I am looking forward to it—although right now I am a little behind in my own studies in it (since I was sick the morning they handed everything out). 

I do have a feeling that this next year will be a journey for me personally—trials, testing, and lessons for me to learn to grow more like Christ.

j0401486

Finally

I have finally figured out how to write my blogs more efficiently. I have downloaded Windows Live Write. It is a really neat computer program where you write your blogs on your PC (edit them and all) then publish them more efficiently.I only downloaded it today and so far I really like it. I am hoping to keep up more with my blog now…:0)